What happened?

I think I've lost track of everything I set out to do,

because everything I wanted

(but never looked for)

came and found me,

came and found me and came

to overtake me.

If this is the one thing

(my everything)

I set my mind to,

let it be for you

for you

for you.

And that's how I'm doing. I don't really know what's going on in my life right now, because it's all "petals on a wet, black bough," as Ezra Pound would have it. It's a great, hurried, beautiful blur, yet I somehow find the energy to focus in on the important details.

This is definitely not where I saw myself ten years ago. It's beautifully better and more real than those young dreams. Being a teacher and a musician is a bit like being Indiana Jones--minus the whip, though most days I wish I could use one in class. At 3:30, I take off my glasses and turn on the amp.

Sometimes I feel the strain of the stretch--like Bilbo said, "butter scraped over too much bread." Throwing myself into two creative avenues is more than consuming, it's exhausting. But I don't care. I'm feeling reckless, and I think it's okay. I think I'm blessed to be able to do everything I love, when I wasn't even looking for either. So, I'll keep on doing it as long as the Lord lets me. If I fail, I'll fail well. Otherwise, I fly.