God's Speed

Is it common knowledge that once a woman reaches the age of 49, she loses the ability to make decisions in under 11 minutes?

Sometimes I have no patience for people who can't make decisions quickly.
who forget small, but important, details.
who slow down when the light is still green.
who cry in front of large groups of people.
who have no awareness of other people.
who don't turn their assignments in and try to make me feel guilty for their irresponsibility.
who don't use commas, who use commas incorrectly, or who hate commas.
who can't read my mind when I want them to.

You want to be my friend now, don't you?

Tonight I wanted to come home, lie in a heap on the floor, fall asleep for 12 hours and have a dream about watching a good movie & consuming 1 lb. of jalapeno chips and 2 pints of Chubby Hubby. And a brownie. Dreams don't have calories.

I did something similar, with more calories. Now I'm going to complete the task, put my head down on the pillow and confess my sins.

Good night and God speed.